Thursday, August 5, 2010

Utter covers and birth plans.

I joined a meet up group here in Seattle. It's all for expectant mommies. I have been to two events and so far I have enjoyed hearing how other women are coping with their pregnancy and what their plans are for child birth. On the message boards today someone posted a link to a great website called,, what a catchy name. They are giving away FREE covers. All you have to do is pay for shipping! Go to the website pick the cover you like and in the promotion code enter "breastfeeding" and your total cost for shipping is $9. It's a great value because these covers can run up to $40 to $50 at fancy baby stores. I ordered mine today. I like the idea of the cover and I have seen them used. It's seems a lot simpler then trying to strategically place a blanket over your shoulder and hope it doesn't slip. Great for outings or company. I am 100% comfortable with a woman breastfeeding in public but I think using a cover eliminates the stares and uncomfortableness other may feel around you. Plus they are super stylish these utter covers! The free promotion only lasts a couple more days so if you know someone who is having a baby this could be a great gift, or a gift to yourself if you are pregnant.

****HUGE DISCLAIMER, this is my blog, therefor my opinions, it is not my intention to discredit anyone woman's birth plan or past birth experience, again, these are my thoughts and not meant to offend. I say almost everything with a touch of humor****

Speaking of my meet up group, I have come to find I am somewhat of the odd man out. I would say 99% of the women I have met are all about the natural birth plan. I think this has a little to do with the fact I am meeting women in the Seattle area. And Seattle tends to be very "green" and all natural. All the woman have someone called a doula. What's a doula you ask? I have heard of the term before but never knew what it meant. So I looked it up and here is what the internet says:

Doula: A doula is an assistant who provides non-medical and non-midwifery support (physical and emotional) in childbirth.

A commmon catch phrase I see when researching the term doula is "women who mother the mother." I don't know, seems very odd to me. I talked with hubby about this whole doula thing and we both have to wonder why even have a husband or partner if you have a doula? To us a doula kind of pushes the man out of the way. Yes, yes I get it, my husband can never truly relate to experience of childbirth, only another woman can really understand what I am going through. But, there is no medical degree called "doula". But I have a hubby with true empathy and support. I don't see a doula in our future.

Another part of the natural birth plan that the women in Seattle have is the midwife. Let's look up this term too:

Midwifery is a health care profession in which providers offer care to childbearing women during their pregnancy, labor and birth, and during the postpartum period.

Now I can get behind the midwife thing a little more then the doula. For one, it's an ancient profession, women have been having babies since the dawn of time and who helped with that - the old woman in the hut next door! But to have a midwife is to go down the natural path and that path is not for me.

I kind of look at it like this: a doctor comes up to you and says he is going to break your arm. You have the option of getting a shot and not feeling the break or get no shot and feel the bone break. My logic says take the shot. But that's my logic. I am not one for pain AT ALL. In fact I am a huge baby, anyone who knows me will tell you that. Drama queen!

The problem I have with people pushing the natural route and making you make a concrete birth plan is that it sets you up for failure. No birth is the same just like no baby is the same. I worry that if you make it your ONLY plan to do natural are you setting yourself up for a huge let down if you can't do it. Are you less likely to accept the help and ease the pain if you can't take it anymore because you are worried what the other moms might think of you? I have been to the hospital after a birth and they don't hand out awards afterward. There is not sign above your door that either reads "Kick ass mom who did it natural" or "Wimpy mom who couldn't bare the pain".

So here's my birth plan: Go to hospital, get checked in... ride out the waves until it's time to get that beloved shot. But I accept I may not get to the hospital in time (unlikely) for the shot, I accept that sometimes things can go wrong and I will do whatever is necessary to keep the baby safe.

My best friend who is a nurse told me "if you make a plan, the opposite will happen" Its good to remember no matter what the plan we all have the same goal in the end. To bring our special gift into this world.

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