Monday, January 31, 2011

Road Trip!

Hubby and I are so lucky to have his parents living in road trip range. They are in Portland and we are in Seattle. About a 3 hour drive without traffic. So we decided to spend the weekend with them. We wanted Jules to have time with her grandparents and we wanted to have my mother in laws cooking! Hubby and I adore her cooking!!

There really isn't anything like a love a grandparent has for their grandchildren. I can see it in the way my parents react to Jules and I can see it in hubby's parents eyes too. There is an amazing bond between them. There is a friendship, unending love and lots of and lots of kisses.

My favorite quote about grandkids and grandparents:

"the reason grandparents and grandkids get along so well is because they have a common enemy"

Juliette and her Gran & Pop. Lots of love right there.

On the way home, slept the whole way!!

Friday, January 28, 2011

A trip to the doctors

You now what I really don't like about motherhood? When the baby is sick or something is wrong and you have NO IDEA how to fix it. It is so heartbraking.

Juliette has had bad skin from the beginning. And honestly, she comes by it naturally. On my side of the family we all have very sensitive skin. There are also common skin conditions on my side as well. So it really wasn't a surprise to me when Juliette started showing signs of skin irritation. First it was the baby acne, which is so common in newborns. Then is was the extreme dry skin and then the cradle cap. All things that other babies I know where going through or had made it through. But with Jules, some of the common skin conditions just seemed to be lingering longer then the other babies. All the above mentioned things pass within a couple of weeks but Jules just keeps getting worse. I have tried so many methods to improve her skin but nothing really helps. Well, last night I noticed her neck was a lot more irritated then usual. I finally threw up my hands and said I am taking her to the doctor, much to the dismay of hubby. But luckily, he saw the helpless mother look in my eyes and didn't argue with my need to see a doctor.

So off to the doctor we go this morning....Jules clocked in at 13 pounds and 13 ounces! She also has eczema on her face and behind her ears. Behind her ears will actually need antibiotics at this point. She also has to have anti fungal cream under her chin, inside her neck folds.(super gross) Jules is a big girl, so her little fat rolls get irritated and moisture loves to live in those areas. And then she needs special lotion for her face because of the eczema.

The doctor reassured me that her case is on the minor side and that it will be all under control soon. The neck thing will clear when Jules can start holding her head and getting air in there more. And the eczema might have flare ups on and off but we can manage those with lotions and TLC.

It just stinks, because I don't want her to be in any discomfort. She doesn't seem to be but it's not like she can talk to me and tell me if it's bothering her. She's such a happy that leads me to believe she's not in any pain.

I will let you know how all the new creams and bath regime help. Doctor said it should clear within the week.

On a side note:
Tonight I have my first 'ladies night out'!! No baby, no husband!!! Last night as Juliette was 'having a moment' and unable to get to her happy place. Hubby reminded me that I had ladies night and that soon I would have a break, haha =) Made that little fussy spell she was having a little more bearable!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

10 weeks!

There is a new lease on life once your baby starts to get into a sleep routine. In my mommy group I can see the desperate faces of the new mommies. I know they aren't getting more then 3 hours of sleep at a time and I know most if not all don't have their mother staying with them like I did. How fortunate was I?!?! I can remember that feeling, no matter how many times someone with an older baby would tell me that it would get better. I didn't believe them. How could you believe anything anyone said to you when you are so sleepy you don't know which way is up? Now I am that mother giving out that advice, "don't worry, it won't last forever". The new mom's eyes stare blankly at you, all you can do is just give them a hug and a coffee.

Juliette is starting to get into a routine of sleep. We start off with a nice warm bath (every other night, her skin gets to dry if we do this daily). Both hubby and I enjoy this and Jules just sits there like she is getting a spa treatment. Hubby and I have our jobs during this bath. Me at the top working on the hair, neck and face. While hubby uses a little cup and pours water on parts not submerged in the water. He wants to keep her warm. He also is the towel guy and lotions and dresses her for bed every night. I love watching him be so gentle and affectionate to her. After that she gets a warm bottle in the rocking chair with mom which puts her to sleep. Up to the nursery she goes, a quick swaddle and off to dream land she goes. Now I would be lying if I said this routine goes smoothly every night. I would say its nice and smooth 80% of the time and to me that's pretty impressive. Jules will go down between 9:30 pm and 10 pm and sleep until 3:30am to 4am, she will take a bottle and go right back down and usually sleep until 7am. Can't beat that.

It's oddly bittersweet. She is transitioning out of the 'newborn' stage and is becoming a baby. I know sounds silly, whats the difference between a newborn and a baby? It's a world of difference, not just sleep wise but emotional wise and the behavior difference is amazing. Its hard to watch her graduate into 3 month old clothing. I found myself holding onto some of her newborn clothes. Putting them in a box for safe keeping. When I hold them up I can't image her being so little and I know I will continue to marvel at her rapid growth daily.

The biggest difference between the newborn Juliette and the 10 week old Juliette is her ability to recognize me and hubby. To have her look at you after you have been away and see her face light up is pure joy. She focuses on your face, she tries to mimic your smile. She is intrigued with the way we talk and make noises. Its fascinating! You really start to bond and connect with her more because she's starting to show you her personality. And the feeling of her bonding with you is overwhelming. To hear her cry out for YOU and for YOU to be the one to be able to sooth her, it slays your heart.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Time After Time

I don't have time to blog at the moment. That's the story of my life right now, 'I don't have time'. Where did time go? Hows does time go by so fast? And when will I have time for myself? Oh time, you are a devilish thing, your here.. but not really.

But, little Jules is growing like a weed. Smiles, smiles and more smiles. Hubby and I are working on getting her to laugh. Don't worry I have a camera with me at all times to catch any laughs or sounds that may come from her.

Until I find time here are some updated pictures:

She's a very happy girl in the morning:

The deep thinker that is Juliette:

And my personal favorite picture of her, she is giving that sly smile and wearing the cutest hat EVER:

Friday, January 14, 2011

Cause baby your a firework

I thought after pregnancy my hormone levels would go back to "normal". But I seem to be a bigger sap then ever before. Case in point: the radio.

There is a new song by Katy Perry called 'firework' and everytime I hear it I start to cry. I start to think of Juliette and how special she is and how great the road ahead of her is going to be.... and I can't help myself, the tears just come.

She can't even sit up by herself yet and I have all these feelings about her growing up and becoming her own person. I imagine such amazing things for her and I just can't believe I get a front row seat. It's overwhelming this love inside of me.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Double Scoop Of Inspiration

As you know I have been really inspired by some of the blogs that I read. I have about four that I follow. 3 out of the 4 about infertility and one is a weight loss journey blog. All these blogs I feel a deep interest in. I have never met any of the ladies but feel a connection to them on this weird blog level.

I was reading a blog post the other day and I was moved to tears. Tears of pure and utter joy. As soon as a read the header I knew I would have the desire to share it with people I know. The blogger writes with a fantastic flow and it draws you right in.

She made and amazing 'music video' with her husband about her IVF experience. It's hard for me to personally watch. It brings up a lot of emotions but 'wow' it is such a true representation of the IVF experience. It just really moves me. She has a lot of readers and I know its not easy sharing a personal story but it helps so many people. Maybe someone will see it on my page and find hope. I know I found hope in her blog. Watch the video here:

After watching the video you will want to read her latest entry on her new blog.

Monday, January 10, 2011

My Darwin Walking Suit

It has snowed in Seattle. Winter doesn't seem to be leaving anytime soon. So that means Juliette and I have to walk the dog in the cold. Here's what we have come up with do it in warmth and style.

Juliette in her snow suit. Or as I call it her Randy suit. You know Randy from a Christmas Story. The mom packed him so tight into the snowsuit he coulding put his arms down!

My end of the deal. The torture device they call a baby carrier. Have yet to master the art of picking up after Darwin with Juliette strapped to me like this.

No excuse now not to walk Darwin. Oh yay!

Friday, January 7, 2011

11 Steps

This was posted in my mommy group.. it made me laugh. Because it is SO TRUE!!

11 Step Program for those thinking of having kids.

by Amy Lawrence

Lesson 1

1. Go to the grocery store.

2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.

3. Go home.

4. Pick up the paper.

5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2

Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...

1. Methods of discipline.

2. Lack of patience.

3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.

4. Allowing their children to run wild.

5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.

Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3

A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...

1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)

2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.

3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.

4. Set the alarm for 2AM.

5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 3AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.

6. Go to bed at 3:45AM.

7. Get up at 5AM when the alarm goes off.

8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 6AM.

9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)

Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4

Can you stand the mess children make? To find out...

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.

2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.

3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.

4. Then rub them on the clean walls.

5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.

6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5

Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.

1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.

2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.

Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6

Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.

1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.

Leave it there.

2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.

3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.

4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7

Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8

1. Hollow out a melon.

2. Make a small hole in the side.

3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.

4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.

5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.

6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.

You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9

Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

Lesson 10

Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11

Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

The Crying Game

So Juliette lives a very charmed life I have decided. The girl has hardly ever cried. In fact she cries so little, if ever, that she is not very good at it. You would think that all babies would be good at crying, not my baby. I could be shooting myself in the foot by saying this *knock on wood*

This afternoon I was changing her diaper and in the middle of the change she peed all over the couch. That was second time in a 24 hour period she has done that. You would think her parents would learn by now. Anyway, I had to strip her down naked cause she was a mess. This all happened in the time frame of Jules wanting to eat. I got a bottle ready for my naked peeing baby but it was a little to hot so we had to wait.

This is a video of said wait:

Notice how she sticks her tongue out and gives a little choke. I know it might be mean tapping her upset and me laughing, but if you catch it you can see her breaking her cry for a smile at me. She doesn't take the crying very seriously.

Don't worry I turned the camera off and feed the poor starving baby.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

This is it.

I've been wrestling with an infertility issue for about a week now. Crazy to be thinking about infertility when your holding your newborn, but I am. My pregnancy group I mentioned in past blogs is moving into a new phase, we have almost all had our babies and our now transforming into a mommy support group. I love it, I feel so lucky to have these ladies around. It's been such a relief to know they are there for me and Juliette since I have no family in the area. It's my lifeline here.

But... some of the ladies are already talking about their future children. Saying things like "well, for the next one" or "we are already planning to get pregnant as soon as possible". And then it comes to me and I get asked : so how many are you and your husband having?

My husband only wants one child and I agreed to that before we married. I knew my only chance to get two would be to have twins. But we all know that didn't happen. But there was still a small part of me that thought 'well maybe he would change his mind'. I would never "trick" him, that is disgusting and not something I am capable of nor would I lie to him like that.

So when asked the question of if we are having more, I blame it on hubby. "Hubby only wants one, and I respect that" for some reason every time I say that I get the follow up question. "Is he sure about that"

Another reason this is a pressing issue for me right now is because it's time to start thinking about birth control. If we aren't going to have more we have to be proactive. Yes, I am an infertile most of the time. There is a small chance that I could have a normal cycle and then a one in a billion shot the right tube could be working. There is that small, slim chance.

That leaves it with me getting on the pill or getting an implant. Or the more logical step just taking care of it on my husbands end.

All this leaves me sad. Because now at some point I need to be comfortable and okay with that fact that it's just going to be Juliette. And I am not going to blame it on hubby anymore, it's not because he doesn't want more then one child.

I need and have realized that it's only going to be one child for us because I can't and won't put myself through the hell we went through to get our beloved baby.

Juliette is amazing and I love her with every fiber of my being and I know that if hubby and were to have more I would have that same love for those children as well. It would be just as magical and just as special but I don't have anything left in me. I don't have the courage to go through the process again. I have to mourn that fact for awhile. I have to comes to terms with it.

So while all my new friends plan and plot their next pregnancy adventures I will cherish the moments I am having now. This is it, it won't and can't get better then this. And when asked if we are having more I will simply and honestly say...

"no, Juliette is the jewel of my life"

Monday, January 3, 2011

Daddy's Voice

Hubby has a very distinctive voice. It's very low and deep. It would be a great radio voice. It is also a voice that carries, which my hubby doesn't believe, but it does. In a past blog I wrote about how when I was in the final stages of pregnancy the baby would respond to hubby when he would talk to the belly. I would get a big kick from her or I could feel her move around.

When we were waiting in the hospital bed getting ready for the c section the doctors put a baby heart monitor on my belly. Juliette was at a nice steady 140 until hubby would start to talk to me, then the heart rate would jump to 170. It was crazy. We would have hubby be quite for awhile and the heart rate would go back down and then we had him speak and like that it was back to 170. It was pretty amazing.

Because of Juliette's strong reaction to hubby's voice he is no longer allowed to talk after 7:30pm. She hears him and she instantly wakes up. Even in a deep slumber his voice will awake her. I could have the TV on, me on the phone and Darwin barking but the moment hubby says something she is bright eyed again!

When he gets home from work and her and I are in the living room he will call up from downstairs and say hello. Juliette's eyes light up, she hears him, she hears her daddy. It melts my heart.

She's attached to him and him to her

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Videos of Juliette

I have been taking some videos of Juliette with my phone the past couple of weeks. Finally learned how to upload them on to the computer. They aren't edited or flashy, just little moments with our baby.

Juliette "talking" to Daddy:

Mine and Juliette's Christmas gift. Juliette likes to dance to it:

Juliette in her bassinet hanging out:

More hanging out:

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Baby on Board

It's funny how putting Jules in the car can completely change the way I drive. Of course it would, there is valuable cargo on board. But I seriously have become a brand new driver. Here are some examples:

- I don't take casual trips anywhere anymore. I have to REALLY want to go somewhere to go through the hassle of bringing Jules with me. No more fast trips to the grocery store.. we need milk.. to bad. We can live without for awhile.

-My car has become a moving nursery. I have diapers, bottles, extra clothes.. I looked at my front seat yesterday and noticed I had 2 pacifiers, one baby sock, baby hat and a "to go" formula wrapper on the front seat. In case we get stuck in a snow storm I can survive with her for about two weeks.

-I have become a better driver, everyone around me has become a terrible driver! Do people around me not know I have a baby in the back seat?!?! Don't cut me off mister, because if you get us into an accident you better hope you not only have car insurance but medical insurance, cause I will hurt you!

-Hubby can't drive! He drove Jules and I up to the mall yesterday and I literally almost had a heart attack sitting in the passenger seat. This could be a control issue, but he doesn't seem to think his driving needs to change now that we have a baby in the car.

-BONUS: With Jules in the car I can drive in the car pool lane! There really is no need for that because I go to slow with her in the car to need the car pool lane but it's nice to know it's there.

-Double mirror view: Trying to keep my eyes on the road while looking at the baby mirror to make sure Jules is safe. And by safe I mean.. is her head up right, is she sleeping... basically is she NOT crying. Who knew when you had a baby you could grow extra eyes and have eyes on the road and the back seat. Amazing.

Driving with Jules is an adventure, hell.. just getting her into the car is an adventure. But, it's something we have to do. I can't stay locked up with her in the house all because I will go crazy.

So watch out road, new mom on the road!

New Year, New Blog

I think one of the reasons I haven't been blogging, besides the fact I have no time is that I don't know where to start. It's been seven weeks since Juliette was born and I have plenty of things to write about but I just haven't. So I am just going to jump in...

When Juliette was just about two weeks old we had her newborn pictures taken at the house. They turned out so fantastic and I am so happy I have proof of how small she was.. because looking at my chunky monkey now it's hard to imagine. (12 pounds now!)

Here are some of our favorites:

2010 was an amazing year. It was the year that put us on a journey. A journey that will lead us to the adventure in 2011.

I look forward to starting this up again and sharing Juliette with everyone. Hubby and I are in love with her in every way.