Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Times they are embarrassing.


Being pregnant can be very embarrassing at times. Especially the last few months.

Examples of embarrassment:

I was on the phone with my Mother-in-law yesterday having a very nice conversation, as always. Unfortunately the conversation was taking place right after breakfast and I burped!! I burped into the phone! Pregnancy burps aren't like normal burps, they arrive without ANY warning.

This evening I was at our park next door throwing the ball around for Darwin. I had on my maternity yoga pants. The waist band sits right below the belly and are VERY comfortable. Well, since the waist is growing and things don't sit where they should anymore... I threw the ball and the movement made my pants fall down! I kid you not, there I was in the neighborhood park with my pants down to my ankles.

I no longer have comfortable "lounge" shirts. I have great maternity shirts but they are nice and more for outings. So in the house I wear one of my many yoga pants and one of hubby's college shirts. Well, hubby's college/fraternity shirts are old and washed many many times. They also have a lot of logos and sayings about drinking, women and all around boy stuff. The other night I ordered food from our local take out and when the guy arrived; there I was a 7 month pregnant chick wearing a shirt with a strip club logo. ::rolling eyes:: yep, it was a special moment between me and the delivery man.

What happened to my bladder? ( that's all I am going to say, I don't even need to tell you the 3 embarrassing stories about my bladder because you know what I am getting at )

I can now get into the bath tub but getting out of the tub seems to be impossible. Screaming for hubby to come rescue me from three feet of water. Because nothing screams embarrassment like a large woman stuck in a bath tub!

I now have no depth perception of how far the belly sticks out. I'm constantly running into things or not opening something far enough to let the belly in. This weekend at the football game Hubby had to pull the car out of the parking space because there was no way my belly was going to be able to squeeze threw our car and the car next to us. Hold on traffic, while my husband repositions the car to let his wife and his wife's belly bump out first.

Speaking of embarrassment: where did my ankles go?

Luckily I find all these moments really funny. I wear my embarrassment like a badge of honor. And since I have such a good sense of humor about it I can always turn that embarrassment right around onto hubby. He gets so embarrassed whenever I break into my baby belly dance. It's just like your picturing it in your head. I move to the movement and do 'vogue' type motions around the belly. It's classic!

"If you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem a whole lot longer than you like."

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